I got clean on December, 25 1981. I have been a member of Bay Area NA for 38 years. My passion and love for recovery helps me stay clean. I felt HOPE in my first meeting. In NA we have EMPATHY. This was necessary for me to get clean. I l was told that NA had no recovery, no book and nobody can stay CLEAN in NA. This was discouraging and very sad. We had 2 meetings a week, both on Thursday in Pinellas County.
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I walked into my first NA meeting in October of 1984. At that time, I did not understand what power the fellowship would eventually have on my life. I was still letting people, places and things drive my behavior and it wasn’t until a year later and another trip through treatment, relapsing one more time, before I finally decided to give this a try. I don’t think I had surrendered yet, but I was on my way. That was November 29th, 1985.
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This is the question that would haunt me all throughout my first year in recovery. I understood the different analogies.I understood that if I kept fighting I would suffer.BUT what was it that I was fighting against? I wanted to put the boxing gloves down. I wanted to make that constant ache within my soul go away I wanted to take the suggestions of those who came before me – “surrender is a necessary part of recovery.”
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